etoiles

I like it when you’re quiet, it’s as if you weren’t here now, and you heard me from a distance, and my voice couldn’t reach you. It’s as if your eyes had flown away from you, and as if your mouth were closed because I leaned to kiss you. Just as all living things are filled with my soul, you emerge from all living things filled with the soul of me. It’s as if, a butterfly in dreams, you were my soul, and as if you were the soul’s word, melancholy. I like it when you’re quiet. It’s as if you’d gone away now. And you’d become the keening, the butterfly’s insistence. And you heard me from a distance and my voice didn’t reach you: it’s then that what I want is to be quiet with your silence. It’s then that what I want is to speak to your silence in a speech as clear as lamplight, as plain as a gold ring. You are quiet like the night, and like the night you’re star-lit. Your silences are star-like, they’re a distant and a simple thing. I like it when y

“Labeling tends to create demarcation walls, separating one human from another just because we affiliate ourselves to this specific identity or that identity” My name is a label, my family name is a label, my religion or faith is a label, my school is a label, my cultural background is a label, my nationality is a label, my ideology is a label, everything that defines me as a person, a someone, is a label. But how we can transcend those labels and realize the fundamental essence of ourselves, that we are all a part of humankind is of most importance. Because the problem is not in the idea of the label itself, but it is when we are so attached to that label or this label, our minds become clouded & our hearts become blinded towards all the things that we have in common, the fact that we are all human beings. One example: My name is Riri. I’m proud to have gone to SMAK 1 BPK Penabur for my high school. For many years, it was hard for me to separate myself from this proud ide

Earthlings is one of the most talked about documentaries in vegan and animal rights circles. I avoided watching it for a year because I thought I ‘knew it all’ already. Little did I know that I still had something to learn. I learned that no matter how many facts you know, how many books you read, how many rallies you attend or how many recipes you look at, nothing, NOTHING compares to actually seeing an animal suffer. This documentary uses a lot of what some people call ‘emotive’ images. I call them truthful images. It goes through all of the various industries that we humans have created that exploit animals and use them as commodities: fashion, food, pets, circuses, research. I recommend this for anyone who is having trouble connecting what is on their plate to something that is a living, sentient being that is capable of feeling pain and knowing suffering.  WARNING:   This movie is very graphic. "People might hope that the meat they buy came from an

Sorry but somehow I don't believe in total reconciliation.

Jiddu Krishnamurti: Can you overcome loneliness? Whatever you conquer has to be conquered again and again, does it not? What you understand comes to an end, but that which you conquer can never come to an end... Now, what is this loneliness of which most of us are aware? We know it, and we run away from it, do we not? We take flight from it in every form of activity. We are empty, lonely, and we are afraid of it, so we try to cover it up by some means or other - meditation, the search for God, social activity, the radio, drink, or what you will - we would do anything rather than face it, be with it, understand it. Running away is the same, whether we do it through the idea of God, or through drink. As long as one is escaping from loneliness, there is no essential difference between the worship of God and addiction to alcohol. Socially, there may be a difference but psychologically, the man who runs away from himself, from his own emptiness, whose escape is his search for God,

When autumn leaves don't fall down to the ground When the world has zero gravity When people love each other and there's no crimes anymore When the economic conditions do not fluctuate That's when I'll stop . If I stopped years ago, no one will ever notice me. If I stop now, I won’t ever get the chance to forgive myself. For all the things I’ve got today. For all the feelings remain the same. For the universe I am living. This failure is enough to make me wanna blow myself up. But not enough to get me quit. People say, a legend knows when to stop. For me, I know it’s not today.

Friend  : How can someone possibly be happy and sad at the same time? Me       : Ever had a great news you can't share?

Kadang hidup bersimpang di tiga atau empat tepi Terhuyung, menarik ulur perasaan seperti secarik layangan di pinggir jalan Melayang. terbang. tersentak dengan benang kaca yang mengiris hati di persimpangan Angin malam beritakan kabar "dia berlayar bebas dan kuat di dunianya" Seorang pemukim di setepi pulau perasaan, Menepi dan menjawab "telah lama biarkan dia pergi dariku namun tidak dari hatiku" Menatap biru, tarian ombak bergejolak. perasaan turut bergejolak. Menoleh kiri dan kanan, akhir ku melihat ke dalam Sesanggup apa diri menunggu sebuah pelayaran, sebuah penantian? Duduk bertepi dengan pantai, buah pikiran teringat Selalu akan menunggumu, agar tak lagi jauh Di sini...

It’s been two weeks since I moved to Netherlands, and unlike many other people who always complain about leaving Indonesia for western country, I, to be honest, am enjoying my stay here. Hahaha. I’m sure it’s not because of the city - bearing in mind the lonely Sunday and the no-mall city, but I think it’s more because I am loving my study so much that I totally forgot that I’m living in here. I’ve been really tied up with study, lately. Nonetheless, I’m learning so many new things every single day at the campus, and luckily I’m doing things that are still very much related to Economics. Something that at least I'm good at. Hahaha. Talking about Netherlands, I can never feel at home in this country. I’m not sure why, but this city always feels foreign to me. Everything I see, passes by like a scene, moving from one frame to another, in a fast pace, representing the unknown, manifesting in a self-contradicting reality, unfamiliar, strange. Not home. - I don’t know w

"I’d volunteer to go to prison, as long as there are books. Because with books I am free." Source: Mohammad Hatta, first vice president of Indonesia.

I always feel that I never learned from my mistakes. I knew that opening myself up to others could help me in a way. Knowing that someone else knows about the burdens I bear. And having the sense of security that they are facing the same things too. But opening myself up also leads to bigger chances to get hurt. Because when I opened up, I let myself to get emotionally attached. I took the trouble of letting someone know who I am, and getting to know that person as is. And as a person, I HATE attachments. It ruins your rationality. It clouds your judgments. It makes you think immaturely. It makes you feel dependent to a certain person. And the worst things about attachments: you start to expect things. you start to assume things to be better than they actually are. you start misreading the signals given to you. I am fully aware of these consequences. I know there are things that I will regret doing. But I still choose to do them anyways. What is that? Is it stupidit

There are a lot of questions I was going to ask you. some that used to run through my mind every day, and some that still are up till now. There are a lot of things I need to tell you. Some are sweet, some are lemonade. There are a lot of things I wanna do for you. And what I mean by a lot is terribly a lot. I put a lot of hope in you. I used to. deeply, I still do. I write letters I never send. I have dreams I never share. I keep secrets I never spill. I have songs I never get to sing.  Well, never mind. Those won't come out now. never. Let them be in my tiny little footlocker. Together with my handwriting in a paper where you can see three big fat words shouting out loud.

A few questions that I need to know How you could ever hurt me so? I need to know what I've done wrong And how long it's been going on Was it that I never paid enough attention? Or did I not give enough affection? Not only will your answers keep me sane But I'll know never to make the same mistakes again You can tell it to my face Or even on the phone You can write it in a letter Either way, I have to know Did I never treat you right? Did I always start the fight? Either way, I'm going out of my mind All the answers to my questions, I have to find

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz, or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off. I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul. I love you as the plant that never blooms but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers; thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance, risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body. I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride; so I love you because I know no other way than this: where I does not exist, nor you, so close that your hand on my chest is my hand, so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep. D, I love you